“The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified..." - John 12:23

Nowadays, we are all busy with earthly concerns and even sometimes take God for granted. We are too preoccupied with school, work and extra-curricular activities. The sad part about it, when bad things happen, we immediately fail to see the bright side on those circumstances, worst, blame God. But have we thought that maybe, often, those circumstances are not of God’s but of our own decisions? It was written from the Catechism of Catholic Church: “God is in no way, directly or indirectly, the cause of moral evil. He permits it, however, because he respects the freedom of his creatures and, mysteriously, knows how to derive good from it.”

We are not perfect but this is not an excuse especially that we are in this community, we should know better. I am guilty of this, though. I have been serving the Lord for 13 years now, but I am still struggling to be like Jesus Christ. Which reminds me, that everyone here, even having part already in a community; more so, still experience trials and challenges.

If you have attended our Lenten Recollection, Father Dan said that “The Church is a classroom of sinners.” This gives us the understanding that we are not perfect yet God continually accepts and loves us. In our Gospel reading, it was told, that the day would come when Jesus would die, for our sins… for us to be saved.

The road to conversion is never EASY. We have to deny ourselves, surrendering everything to the Lord… even to the point of carrying our own crosses. But do not be afraid because, God had been with us all this time… He is with us. As what I have learned in our Lenten recollection from Father Dan: “God is hidden in the most unlikely places, you just don’t know because you are so engrossed with the situation/problem.”

Through my experiences, I learned that when you are serving God, it is very challenging or rather the most challenging thing to do:

1.    You will be tested all the time

2.    You will have to let go of things that are not of Him.

Most people believe that when we pray, God will make things easier but that is not the usual case. Even before we were born God had planned everything for us, and sometimes what He has planned for us may not coincide to our wants and desires. This is the “self” hard part, if we want to follow Christ, we must learn to let go of our own desires and accept His will. But don’t get me wrong, Following Christ may be really hard but it is worth it. By this, we need to pray for us to learn to trust Him all the way. We need to ask God to make us stronger and ask for the Holy Spirit to equip us. When we are in trouble, we need to pray harder because that’s the time when we are most vulnerable.

For the past 6 months I have been trying hard to stay in a relationship, struggling to keep that someone very valuable, to stay in his place in my life. I thought I could do it on my own, fixing our concerns more so fixing myself. But I was wrong. Imagine, in the longest time, I’m still here wondering if everything is still of worth. And then it came to me, I had to accept that I was wrong fixing it on my own, I needed God. I needed Him to tell me the truth that I have a problem and He is the one who can fix everything.

Sometimes, we have to experience separation from everything. We need time for ourselves and intimately with God in discerning what really His plan is for us. On the time that I have decided to have my time off, trying to fix myself and allowing God to work into me, things didn't happen to what I was hoping for. I was vulnerable, then there was a lot of temptations like alcohol and people who I thought would help me along the way, rather became the distractions on my discernment. I failed.

My point is not encouraging you guys to be in a relationship most especially in your young age. My point is, even allowing God to work in us, temptations would still be present. And best thing to resist temptation, is to continually and constantly ask God for guidance and strength.

In the second reading it reminds us of the importance of Obedience. During my discernment I did terrible things. I came to realize after the “things” that happened, when we obey, we should know how to listen. We should constantly remind ourselves that sometimes what we want are the things that could possibly lead us away to the better place and complicate our lives more.

We should be thankful to God for He’s so passionate in loving us, constantly reminding us that He will always give what we need. I am very happy and blessed that God gave me people to help me find my way back when I am lost.  Sometimes we need a little “batok” to make us realize that what we are doing is wrong and we need to stop doing the same mistake. I am thankful that even if I almost had a fight with my best friend, because of not listening to her most of the time, I was just blessed because she never gave up believing in me that I will do what is right, not for anything else, simply, because she cared for me. And that was the turning point of everything. I hope you will find, rather, see those people in your lives. Cherish them because they are God’s instruments and they can help you in your road to conversion.

Lastly, the first and second reading reminds us of repentance.

According to Google…

Repentance - is the activity of reviewing one's actions and feeling contrition or regret for past wrongs. It generally involves a commitment to personal change and resolving to live a more responsible and humane life.

In the first reading God said that we should sin no more. Basically, in repentance, we should avoid sin. God is a merciful God, but we should also do our part and not do the same mistakes again.  In addition, the second reading asks us to persistently pray to God to create in us a clean heart to avoid sin and temptation. We are blessed because despite sinfulness, we are still invited to repent and to live a purer and holier life.

We are all prone to temptation but we can fight it. I hope you have learned from what I have experienced. I was weak and failed to fight temptation. In times like these, I am always reminded of my commitment to the youth ministry and to God. When faced with temptations, or sinned or did the same mistakes go to confession and seek help. Seek help from God and Seek help from those who will be there and would pray for you, like our friends in this community. It’s okay to ask for help when we are struggling, sometimes they are your God given angels to remind us that God will never give up on us. I am very blessed that in spite of my brokenness, I have this Ministry, who will not judge me rather, constantly accept me regardless of my failures. Most importantly, the road to conversion is again a life long process so we should persistently pray for God to give us a lot of strength and wisdom to resists temptation and sin. We are sinners but God will always be there to save us and never give up on us. In his time, as the song “Little by little” goes “though its been slow growing but there’s a knowing that someday perfect I will be.”

- Denise Madrazo