“Then repay to Caesar what belongs to Caesar and to God what belongs to God.” - Matthew 22:21

“Very well, pay Caesar what belongs to Caesar -- and God what belongs to God.”

In the gospel the Pharisees asked Jesus’ opinion about paying tax to Caesar but asking Jesus’ opinion was the way of testing him, but Jesus being Jesus the awesome one figured out what the Pharisees are doing so he said “You hypocrites! Why are you putting me to the test?” then Jesus asked the Pharisees for the money that they pay the tax with. The Pharisees handed him a denarius then Jesus asked “Whose portrait is this? Whose title?” then they replied “Caesar’s”. Jesus then told them “pay Caesar what belongs to Caesar -- and God what belongs to God”

Sometimes, we doubt Jesus despite everything that he have given us and what does it make us? Hypocrites. Who are we to doubt and judge his intentions when the only thing he did was to give us what we need and more. There comes a time in our lives when we doubt his intentions because it seems like the bright side of life is nowhere to be found.

So last year was that time of my life when I have failed two of my subjects and the sad part was failing those subjects mean another year in college. When I received the grades that I highly doubt I deserve was the time when I felt like the world and everything in it was against me. For weeks all I ever did was cry. I became distant to people not because I thought that they were the reason why I failed but because I thought that God was being unfair for he gave all the rainbows and happiness to them while I was given a storm. There was a time I asked him: “Naga pray man ako. Naga go man ako mass every Sunday. Naga serve man ako sa BLD pero bakit bagsak pa rin ako?” but it doesn't work that way. Looking back and realizing that I’ve said and asked those things to him made me realize that I was a total hypocrite for doubting his ways and blaming him for my mistakes. In the first place hindi man siya ang nag answer ng quizzes ko and exams so who am I to blame him, right? Maybe God has better plans and it’s not yet my time to pass that subject, that’s what I keep telling myself. When reality kicked in and I came back to my senses and accepted the fact that time machine doesn't exist and there is no possibility to have a rewind and to fix my mistake was the time when I realized that crying and feeling sorry for myself won’t do me any good. The damage has been done and all I can do is move on and do better since I was given a chance – a chance that I have no intention on putting to waste. I promised to do better not just for myself but for my parents and of course for God because everything I have is because of him. I promised myself that I will own it and i can do better than before. Now, I finished those subjects and all the sleepless nights paid off for I got grades that I never thought I had a chance of getting. So every time I feel like I am going down again there is this mantra (it’s a song though) that I sing in my head or out loud until I feel better, it goes like this:

It’s like we all had better days

Problems getting all up in your faceJust because you go through itDon’t mean it gotta take control, no

God gives us what he thinks we deserve and in return we shall not doubt his intentions for he surely has a good reason. If he thinks that we should have it then he will give it to us we just have to wait. Nothing in life comes easy and blessings may come in any form. Sometimes the worst storm may be the greatest blessing. All we have to do is open our eyes and see the brighter side of things and remember that Prizes are given after a game. Rainbow comes right after the rain. Medals and trophies are given after reaching the finish line. So now do you get the plot twist? We may be a zero right now but he can turn us into a hero and just like any other movies, superheroes were once underdogs we just have to trust our main man. So puso lang!   We may have our fair share of downs but he always got our back. 

-Jannah Aretano